You left when i was only two years old
And all you left me with was an identical face and curly ginger hair
When i was 18, and i saw you for the first time after three years, i noticed how even our hands were replicas of yours
How every freckle on my skin matched with yours
How my eyes resembled empty oceans
The same ocean my mom once swam on
And at 28, i realized that you and i are complete opposites
And i can breathe because of it
Thank you for the almost 29 years of endless lessons
I think i passed the test
When i was seven years old, you took vows to love my mother for the rest of her life
You took the place of my absent father and i loved you for that
You carried me in your arms and kissed my cheeks like i was yours
When my brothers were born, i never felt less of your daughter
I was just happy i got to share my brothers with you and my mom
When i was 19, you left for the first time
I saw you cry in a fetus like position when my mom asked you to leave
At 24, you left again
You rented an apartment for yourself and left with very little explanation
You were always so cowardly to face your children
Always handing the burden to my mom as if she didn't already have enough on her plate
You fucking coward
The past two years of you coming and going became routine to us
Being a husband part-time seemed like the better choice
Especially since you never wanted to deal with anything
The past two years you have taken off the mask of the man i once loved and shown your true colors
That of a man i no longer know
No longer respect
And no longer love
And the damage you caused to your family; my mom and my brothers, will never be repaired
And for that, i hate you
The way i have never hated anyone in my life
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